I'm a dork...please don't read if you're a hot woman.

I hate being disappointed by movies, I take it almost personally. Ok, I do take it personally, “Surely, it will get better,” I tell myself as I continue to sit through a clearly doomed picture, refusing to move. But then crying, “How could they do this?” as I cry on the way home. I can only remember walking out of one movie in my life, Krull, way back in ‘83. I’d like to say that it was so horrible that I couldn’t stand it, but it couldn’t have been worse than 10,000 B.C., which I sat through.
No, the truth is that I walked out of Krull because Stephanie Bates was chewing on my ear and whispering what she was going to do to me when we got back to the car…so, out we went.
Anyway, what the hell was I talking about? Ah, yes, the disappointment that a bad movie can bring. A bad movie on tape or disc is no problem, I’m far more adventurous in that regard and will rent movies I’m not sure about because if I don’t like them I can turn them off, or just wander in and out while cleaning, or writing.
But going to the theater takes commitment, in time and money (cost today for three with snacks: around $35.00), so I was a little nervous about seeing Speed Racer today, especially after reading reviews of how bad it was. It flippin’ rocked.
I think a lot of reviewers forgot something, the film is based on an old cartoon, an old cartoon that, though I liked it as a kid, I find nearly unwatchable as an adult, and were expecting something more dramatic, darker. I bet these critics also hate the 60s Bat Man TV series because it made the Caped Crusader out as a joke and “ruined” the comic book series for two decades after. Again…cartoon, get the F over it.
I think Speed Racer is beautiful; the colors, the animation, great actors doing a superb job with campy dialog and pulling it off, making it fun to hear, and race tracks that look like every eight year old boy’s wet dream of a Hot Wheels setup. The movie hit all the right notes for me with regards to referencing the original material, and all anime since, and never once in two hours and fifteen minutes of run time was I bored.
In fact, if you liked the campy Bat Man, if you’ve ever gone shopping for pink plastic flamingos to piss off the neighbors, if you secretly love some music that you hope none of your friends find out about, I think you will leave the theater after more than two hours of bright, flashing, roller coaster simulation-like racing action as I did; slightly nauseous, but giddy and ready to go again.