Sandwich Rip Off!

In an effort to not be sued this month (actually, I've been litigation free for almost four months), I'm changing the name of the restaurant in question. We'll call it U-Bahn. U-Bahn serves sandwiches and salads and a fat guy once got famously thin by eating their food, and I was hoping to replicate that success since hyper-extending my muffin top last week.
I've now figured out why that guy lost so much weigh, there's no flippin' food on an U-Bahn sandwich. On a six-inch sandwich, named after one of our fine New Mexico towns, there are three slices of turkey, two tiny triangles of cheese and two thin slices of bacon (hold 'em up, you can see through 'em!), for a grand total of maybe five ounces. The rest is lettuce, a couple of slices of tomato, green chile and guacamole. In U-Bahn's defense, they are generous with the last two toppings. In my defense, my sandwich artisan left all of the green chile on one end of the sandwich; I believe it was the left end.
Three little strips of bell pepper and maybe four of onion and then some mustard and my sandwich was ready to go. This and a bag of chips for just under seven dollars and we wonder why more people don't try to eat healthy on the go; I know I was wishing I'd gone next door to McDonalds as I was eating what tasted like a lettuce, guacamole and mustard sandwich, at least it did until I got the left end.